Oh, Kansas City sports. I want to love you. I do love you. But you make it so hard. It's starting to feel like loving an abuser.
I grew up listening to every Royals game. My parents always let me wear my headphones at the dinner table, as long as I only covered one ear and followed along with the conversation. Oh, and as long a I kept my parents informed. I named my stuffed animals after Royals. I cried when my favorite player got traded away. The Royals winning the World Series in 1985 was the highlight of my childhood. But then Dick Howser got a brain tumor and it's all been downhill since.
And then there are my Chiefs. I have a couple of stuffed animals named after them, too. I've watched every game possible. I have jerseys and hair ties and, yes, even underwear. I make sure I always have my red cowboy boots ready for game day. But none of that matters as they don't seem to know what to do in any phase of the game.
But, damn, you guys just refuse to reciprocate. You lose and you lose and you hire horrible coaches and make awful trades. You get blown out by the Buffalo Bills and get swept by the Minnesota Twins (whose fans are the absolute worst when they come to my stadium). For crying out loud, I'm considering this Royals season fairly decent because we're in 3rd place in our division. We're not last!
Maybe life wouldn't seem so dreary and depressing if I didn't let you drain all my hope and optimism and positive energy year after year. Maybe, just maybe, it's time for me to quit you.
But I won't. I can't. You know I'll keep watching every Royals game til game 162. And I'll still tune in for the next 14 Sundays, even if it's just to watch the Chiefs bumble and stumble their way to a 2-14 record. (Which seems like a lot of wins for the team I'm watching today.) And next March, I'll be optimistic and excited for the new Royals season. And next August, I will eagerly await that first snap. So keep abusing my love, guys, because you know I'll come back every time.
You should probably thank Sporting KC for it if I don't lose all hope. Because they are finally giving KC sports fans what we so desperately want: a winning team with a real shot. They've already won a trophy this season, winning the US Open Cup, which gets them into a tournament involving the premiere teams from all the leagues in our World Cup qualifying region. And we're leading the Eastern Conference with one of the best records in all of MLS. No pressure, Sporting, but I'm pretty sure all of KC's sports hopes rest on your shoulders...
Hey, at least the Chiefs finally scored a touchdown today. So now we're only down by 25 with 6:26 to go.