Sunday, April 15, 2012

Running on empty

Do other people go through each day feeling as discouraged as I do, or is it really just me? All through childhood, I was the kid who couldn't sleep at night because I was sure that nuclear war would break out any day. Now, I am consumed by fears that global climate change has reached an irreversible stage and most of the planet doesn't believe it's happening anyway, so we're doomed. Maybe it's easier to give in to that gloom and doom thought when one's own life doesn't have much of a future to look forward to. Politics is so ugly and divisive these days. The economy, or at least people's perceptions of the economy, doesn't seem to be getting better and is probably within 2 to 3 decades of total global collapse (according to one article I read recently). Certainly, my own economic situation isn't getting any better with every bill I have going up and up and up while my paycheck remains stagnant. And, of course, since I'm so mired in this sense that there is nothing left to be hopeful or optimistic about, I don't seem to have many friends left who are willing to hang out with me or chat with me. To those of you who think you have heard bad views from me lately, I can only assure you that you've only been exposed to the tip of the iceberg.

Which is all to say I could really use something good right about now. New people. New opportunities. New hope. But I'm so wrung out from trying and failing, I just don't have any energy left to go look any more. The something good has to find me because I sure haven't found it, despite what I really think were some solid attempts. And it wouldn't hurt if the Royals could find some dang pitching.

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