In which pissing someone off kinda cheers me up

On Friday, two co-workers and I started happy hour a little early.  (Sure, they're friends, too, but I wanted it to be clear that they're also public defenders.)  Perhaps understandably, the waiter mistook us for teachers, because who else begins happy hour at 3:30?  (We did not leave work early; our office officially closed early that day.)  I can see how public defenders and public school teachers could give off similar vibes.  And we probably discuss our clients/students in similar exasperated-but-loving ways.

Then, both my co-workers suggested that I do not give off much of a public defender vibe.  At least not as much as some others do.  I'm not gonna lie; I was a little offended.  It's that I'm too well put together, they said.  I'm not shabby enough.  Ok, well that's true.  I have nicer suits than a public defender probably should.  And I have great shoes.  But, still, how do I not just ooze "public defender"?  I'm as hard core as they come.  I'm the truest of the true believers.  I've got the biggest attitude and the loudest mouth.  Don't I?  I'm the one who, Jerry Kellerman-like, can't be trusted to socialize after work with prosecutors because I can't leave the adversarial process at the office.  So hearing that I don't give off that vite let me feeling a little shaken.  I'm nothing if I'm not a public defender.  So if people don't get "public defender" vibe from me, they must get nothing.  I've been beaten down by the cold and the piles of snow everywhere and the return of the soul-crushing workload.  I was perfectly ready to feel crushed to hear that my public defender aura was only in my head.

But then Saturday night dinner came around.  And let me assure you, I've still got it.  I may not dress like a public defender, but boy, howdy, do I talk like one.  And there is no public defender in the region who can piss people off as thoroughly and unrepentantly as I can.  At a fancy restaurant, celebrating a friend's birthday, no less.  I drove half the table away for a smoke break, and I still didn't apologize.  Ok, maybe I should learn to tone down the anti-prosecutor, anti-cop, anti-politicians-who-are-endlessly-tough-(meaning-thoughtless)-on-crime rhetoric.  And I probably shouldn't be proud of pissing off another friend of the birthday boy.  And I certainly don't mean to imply that public defenders are all boorish folks who swear like sailors.  But I'm like that.  I kind of liked being the p.d. that all the other p.d.s had to keep an eye on to make sure I didn't get into a bar fight.  (Which only ever really came close once, and, honestly, I'm too much of a bleeding heart liberal wannabe pacifist to actually hit anyone.)  So it was kind of nice to know that I still had it, that I could still piss people off that quickly without even trying.  And, really, it was partly her fault, too.  Don't defiantly tell me you're ok with keeping the death penalty if you aren't prepared for me to respond with equal defiance.